The Erkland Trail

AAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDVEEEEEEEENTURRREEE
You are about to read some extremely important TMK lore. Make notes, because it'll be on the test.

This details the epic saga of a group of 5 idiots who ventured about 300 miles to go to Erkland to visit a Halloween party where their other 3 friends are waiting.

The story evolves around our 5 main characters;

Jamie, the currently self-appointed leader who is constantly and deservedly berated by his group for being the absolute worst leader ever. He refuses to give up his position due to "determination." Hobbies include throwing people into lakes and pushing people off cliffs due to disobedience. You know what? At least it's a change in leader for once.

Eelee, the egotistical oaf who, depressingly, is still by far the most qualified candidate for a leader. Everyone hates him, and that's basically his entire personality unless you decide to risk death and listen to his toxic stories. Hobbies include hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey and hockey. Lets get some heads up hockey.

Rob, whose edginess surpasses even his sword's. All he does is constantly groan about how horrible his life is or how his teammates are idiots. Sentence topics include self-loathing, insulting, self-insulting, self harm, red or black stuff, and teapots. Don't stand too close or you'll be cut.

Yoshi, the teammate who, instead of contributing to the team, just ruins other peoples' lives. It's fine though, because he's a hero, probably! Hobbies include stealing food and blaming it on others, shaking their cart until it breaks or sinks, and just generally not being helpful.

Drew, who should technically be called Bowser, but that's dumb, and you're dumb, so stop being dumb, you dumb idiot. Despite the fact that he shouldn't be able to speak English, has terrorized kingdoms for years, and has just generally been evil, he's a hero and suddenly and inexplicably one of the TMK crew's closest allies, so that's A-OK!!!! Drew does nothing but scarf down rations, get bitten by snakes, and rely on others to do work for him, or else he'll get angry, which means nothing at all. Because his general Ultra is not with him, he doesn't have a fun time on the trip. And nobody has fun when he's around either.

Other currently away heroes include Squirt, who has the character traits of a plank of wood, Cryst, who is increasingly creepy and is possibly a man, and Ultra, the most normal human being there could be.

Needless to say, it's a pretty solid team!

Chapters
Prologue - A Completely Pointless Adventure